Fatalism Read online

  “Should I follow you there?” I asked.

  He pulled me towards him, and his brows creased. How was I ever going to say no to such a beautiful man?

  “No, you’re coming with me. Leave your car here. We can come back and get it later.”

  He squeezed my hand and we walked towards the almost empty parking lot. My heart raced, at the thought of him not wanting to drive separately. We walked up to his sleek Porsche Crossover, and I couldn’t believe my eyes, in front of me was my dream car.

  “Oh my God. I can’t believe you drive a Panamera?”

  He looked at me with desire burning in his eyes. “I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard you.”

  I stared at the beautiful four-door shiny Crossover Porsche that was in front of me. It was matte black with tinted windows and black wheels. I turned and looked at him in complete awe.

  “Did you really just say that?” he asked.

  I laughed. “Say that you drive my dream car, a Porsche Panamera Turbo? Yeah, I did. What can I say, I’m a sucker for speed.”

  He ran his free hand through his hair. “Fuck, do you have any idea what you are doing to me? Then you go spouting off about cars. I’ve been walking around at half-mast since the moment I saw you in that skirt. I don’t think I can I sit through dinner with you. I need you.”

  I smiled on the inside. I had never had a man speak so freely to me. I liked that about him.

  “Hey there mister, we have a deal. Dinner, and then I make my decision, and you have to live with it. Remember?

  He sighed in frustration and leaned down to kiss my cheek. “If you decide to give us a chance, I promise you won’t regret it. If you only knew the things I want to do to you, I don’t think there is a way you could say no.”

  He opened the passenger door for me and playfully swatted my backside as I yelped in surprise. I watched him as he walked around the front of the car with such ease and grace and slid into the driver’s seat. He started the car and then reached over and grabbed my hand. We pulled out of the parking lot, he turned up the song and kissed my knuckles.

  We drove in silence just a few blocks away and quickly arrived at a restaurant I’d never heard of before called Lazio’s. The valet opened my door for me and spoke to Vincent by name.

  “Good evening, Mr. Mileski. Welcome back to Colorado.”

  “Thanks, Chad. Take good care of my girl and no joyriding, okay?”

  He smiled at Vincent. “You got it.”

  Vincent came around the car and grabbed my hand.

  The inside of the restaurant had old-world charm with dark woods throughout and dim lighting. A long bar expanded to my left with mirrors on the back, reflecting the hundreds of bottles of alcohol, and to the right was the expansive dining area.

  “Good Evening, Mr. Mileski. Just the two of you for tonight?”

  He squeezed my hand, which I quickly liked the feeling of. Surprisingly, I didn’t feel the typical anxiety of PDA, like I normally did.

  “Yes, and will you let Charlie know I have a guest I’d like him to meet?”

  “Absolutely, sir. Right this way.” The hostess walked with a sway in her hips but Vincent didn’t seem to notice. He looked down at me with a reassuring smile and led me in front of him through the dining area. How had everyone here known his name?

  We were seated at a private booth in the back of the restaurant. Vincent ushered me into the seat, opting to sit next to me rather than across from me. The hostess rambled something off before leaving, but my mind was too busy racing to notice what she’d said. When I opened my menu, Vincent grabbed it from me.

  “Don’t bother,” he said.

  I arched my eyebrow at him. “Excuse me, Vincent. What’s going on here?”

  He looked nervous. “My father owns this place.”

  Was he serious? He brought me to meet his father after a week of knowing each other? I put my face in my hands. This was crazy. What had I got myself into? Had he not been sitting next to me, I would have run out of this place.

  “Say something,” he said.

  I left my face in my hands as I searched for the courage to speak. “You brought me here to meet your father when we are supposed to be getting to know each other better and making a decision on how to proceed. Do you have any idea how crazy that seems?”

  He shifted nervously in his seat and then turned towards me.

  “I know what you’re thinking, and it’s not like that, I brought you here because they have the best food in town. I grew up in this restaurant, and I figured if you saw how genuine my father is, that maybe it will help your decision. I know you think I have a bad reputation with work and the cases I handle, but Alexa, everyone deserves a fair trial, and that’s what I give my clients. Please don’t be upset with me. I want tonight to be perfect. I want you to get to know the real me and give us a chance. If you say no, I don’t know how I’m going to handle that.”

  I turned towards him in the booth and he ran his hands down the front of my thighs. He lifted my face so I was looking into his eyes. I could see the anxiety etched across his face, and I gave him a reassuring smile.

  “Vincent, I want to get to know you as well. That’s why I’m here. I was just surprised that you brought me to meet you father.”

  He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips kissing the inside of my wrist. “Thank you, for understanding.”

  “Am I really not allowed to look at the menu?”

  He shook his head. “My dad loves it when he has special guests. It gives him a reason to cook rather than manage and oversee the operations of the restaurant. He used to always cook until my mom passed away. After we lost her he refused to hire someone to help out with the administrative tasks, that is what she did and loved. He rarely sees the inside of the kitchen now.”

  “I’m sorry you lost your mom.”

  He nodded his head as if he was deep in thought. “It’s okay. We’re not here to talk about that; we’re here to get to know each other better.”

  He ran his deft fingers over my thighs as we sat facing each other. The close proximity was intoxicating, and I needed to continue talking to keep myself in control. “I’m assuming your dad is Charlie?”

  He smiled. “Yeah, that’s him.”

  “Any siblings?”

  “An older brother. His name’s Abel.”

  I couldn’t imagine another beast of a man that looked like the God sitting next to me.

  “Are you and Abel close?”

  “We used to be before I moved to Arizona and he became consumed with work. He is a fire fighter working on becoming a fire chief. I guess you could say we’ve grown apart. He’s part of the reason why I came back to Colorado.”

  I saw the genuine expression come across his face, and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing him. He had so many sides to him; at work he was strong and confident. But this other side was caring, genuine, and funny. How did I end up with him being interested in me: plain, timid, and controlling Alexa?

  “Umm, excuse me?” a man said as he cleared his throat.

  Vincent pulled away from me and stood up. “Dad, it’s so good to see you. You look great.”

  The two men hugged, and I noticed that Vincent resembled Charlie in more ways than one. They were both tall and broad shouldered with the same hazel eyes.

  “I’m sorry to have interrupted the two of you, but please, introduce me to this lovely young woman.”

  He looked down at me with pure interest in his eyes.

  “Dad, this is Alexa Schaefer. Alexa, this is my father, Charlie Mileski.”

  I stood to shake his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Mileski.”

  He shook his head. “Please, call me Charlie. It’s nice to meet you as well. How did the two of you meet?”

  Vincent gestured for us to sit back in the booth. “We met a few weeks ago at 9th Door.”

  Charlie smiled at me. “So this is the girl you were telling me about?”

  What the hell he to
ld his dad about me?

  “Yeah, this is her. I never thought I would see her again, and when I walked into work, there she was.”

  Charlie raised his eyebrows. “Wow, well don’t let me interrupt you two, especially since you’re just getting to know one another. Plus, I have a meal to cook for you two. Alexa, I do hope you like red meat?”

  I nodded my head at him as Vincent stretched his arm behind me.

  “Good, I’ll have a waiter bring over a bottle of wine while I prepare your meal. Alexa, it was a pleasure meeting you.”

  He reached for my hand, and I gave it to him willingly, he kissed it in the most gentlemanly fashion.

  “Thank you, Charlie. It was nice to meet you as well.”

  As he walked off, Vincent started to rub my thighs again. What was with him and my thighs tonight? I hated my thighs. I turned towards him again, in hopes that he would stop because I was feeling self-conscious.

  “Jesus Christ, you’re wearing stockings?” he murmured.

  His hands grazed the tops of my stockings, and I quivered from the pleasure it sent through my body. He clenched my thighs with his strong hands and held my gaze with his eyes.

  “You have no idea how bad I want to peel those off of your legs with my fucking teeth.”

  Breathe, Alexa. Breathe.

  “Maybe I’ll let you.”

  He chuckled. “A man can only hope.”

  Our meal was delicious; his father was an exceptional cook. It was by far the best beef tenderloin I had ever tasted. It was topped with a blue cheese crumble which was one of my favorites.

  Vincent was affectionate, which was something I normally didn’t do in public. Had it been another man, I wouldn’t have liked it, but with Vincent, I couldn’t seem to get enough of his touch.

  We laughed and joked like we had earlier in his office. The conversation was effortless, and I noticed the constant smile I had on my face. I learned that he was a Colorado native and went to law school in Arizona.

  Come to find out, he went to high school with C.J. and Liam, so when they had an opening at the firm, he was happy to join. That’s why I never saw him when they were interviewing applicants. They had wanted him to come work for them, but he was loyal to the firm in Arizona. After lots of soul searching and a visit to Colorado, his mind was made up. He said he was glad he made the decision to leave Arizona; if he hadn’t then he would’ve never met me.

  It was crazy to have someone put their feelings out there like that. I had never had anyone be so honest with me, and at the same time, I didn’t question his motives. I could feel that he was being genuine with me, and for that I was grateful. Honesty was the one and only thing I searched for in people, and far too many times, I was lied to.

  I watched Vincent as we drove away from the restaurant. He had removed his coat and rolled the sleeves of his white dress shirt up. He looked calm and casual. I loved the way his large hands gripped the steering wheel, and I imagined them on my body. On the inside, I was smiling to myself, thinking of how I ended up here. Last night I yearned for him and thought I had messed everything up, now here I was with him.

  He glanced over at me and said, “You’re staring.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Maybe I am.”

  He chuckled softly; I loved the sound of his light laughter.

  “Stay the night with me?” he asked.

  I wanted nothing more. Rules or no rules, I wanted to be with him. I had to be with him. I leaned over the armrest and kissed his neck. Taking my free hand, I rubbed the front of his pants. He was already hard and growled from deep in his throat. I continued to rub between his legs and kiss his neck and face.

  He smiled and said. “I take that as a yes?”

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  Just then he jerked the car off the highway, and I flew back into my seat.

  “Sorry, almost missed the exit.”

  I laughed out loud and the heard my cell phone ring inside my purse.

  “Shit. It’s my roommate Cara.”

  “Are you going to answer it?”

  I cringed on the inside, thinking of what I was going to say to her. I figured it was better to handle it now rather than later. I couldn’t blow her off. It was already after nine o’clock, and she had her date tonight. She was going to be pissed if I didn’t help her get ready.

  “Hey Cara.”

  “Where the hell are you?”

  “Listen, I’m really sorry, but we all had to stay late for a big case we have coming up on Monday. I should’ve call earlier, but I lost track of time. I probably won’t make it home tonight, so don’t wait up for me.”

  “Ha, that’s bullshit. Since when do you work all-nighters?”

  “I’m not bullshitting you.”

  As much as I hating lying to my friend, I didn’t want to get into the details of what had happened between Vincent and me right now.

  “You’re with him aren’t you?” I stayed silent, unsure of what to say.

  “I’ll take your silence as a ‘yes’ and that is officially a breach of girl code. Thanks for forgetting about me and my date tonight. Good luck with Vincent.”

  When she hung up on me, I put my phone in my purse and stared out the passenger window.

  “She didn’t take that well?” he asked.

  I shrugged my shoulders.

  “I’m sorry, beautiful. You don’t deserve to be yelled at. Please don’t let her upset you. You’re just following your heart you can’t feel bad for that.”

  I smiled at Vincent, taking his hand in mind. “Thanks for saying that. You really are too sweet.”

  He gave me a reassuring smile as he pulled into a long circular driveway.

  “Well, here we are. Home sweet home. Come on.”

  His home stood two stories with a four-car garage; it was modern with mixture of dark stucco and stone. The home was illuminated by lights shining up the sides every few feet. It had large pillars on the front and a set of double front doors made of frosted glass and wrought iron. There were vines running up the pillars giving it a lush feel.

  He opened the front door, and I stepped inside. It was just as inviting on the inside. There was a mixture of neutral colors, with plush furniture and light wood floors. The floor plan was open and wide, with a large staircase that curved up to the second level. I watched Vincent as he turned on a few lights, and then headed into the kitchen.

  “Would you like a glass of wine?” he asked.

  “Sure.”

  “Chardonnay or Riesling?”

  I slid my shoes off and walked to the back glass doors. “Riesling please. It’s my favorite.”

  The doors were more of a glass wall, and the view was breathtaking. As I looked outside I couldn’t see any homes close by. There was nothing but sprawling open space.

  “Wow. You have a pool in Colorado?”

  He handed me a glass of wine, and I took a small sip, allowing the crisp flavor to roll down my throat.

  “Of course I do. I’ve lived in Arizona for the past five years. A home with a pool was a must for me.” He grabbed my free hand and said, “Let me show you around.”

  We made our way through the entire house, and it was just what I would’ve pictured his home to be: masculine, modern, yet comfortable. The last room we came to was his bedroom. It was clean and organized, just like the rest of the house. He had a gigantic king-sized bed with the comforter and décor being a mixture of creams, browns, and reds.

  When I walked farther into the room, I noticed the expansive skylights in the ceiling.

  “Those are impressive.”

  He walked over to me, taking my wine and placing it on the nightstand. “You like them? Those along with the pool are what sold me on the house. I love the stars at night. In Colorado you can only see them on a clear night, so I wanted to be able to lie in bed and watch them during the few opportunities I had.”

  He loved the stars just like I did. We both looked intently up into the night sky; he wrapped his arms around m
y waist and pulled my body tightly against his. I looked over into his hazel eyes. He didn’t look at me as he concentrated on the stars.

  “You’re staring again,” he said.

  “I can’t help it. You’re enticing.”

  He looked into my eyes and pushed my hair off of my shoulder, nuzzling my neck. “So are you.”

  I leaned my head to the side to allow him more access as he kissed and sucked my ear and neck. He knew what I wanted without me having to ask.

  “You smell incredible, and I love the way your skin tastes. It’s so sweet.” His hands left my waist, gliding up my body to my breasts. He caressed them through my shirt and my nipples immediately hardened at his touch. I moaned and pushed my chest out to fill his hands.

  “I have been dying to touch your body like this, I can’t wait to feel it when you’re naked.”

  I whimpered from the pleasure that was building inside of me. He hadn’t even touched my skin and I was ready to explode from his expert touch through my clothing.

  I moved my hands and placed them on his biceps to steady myself. I was a mixture of lust and desire, and I needed to calm myself down. I wanted to enjoy this moment and not rush things. Normally when I got to this point, I ended things as quickly as they started so I could regain control.

  I leaned over and kissed him. He greedily accepted my tongue, caressing it over and over. I moved my fingers and slowly started unbuttoning his shirt, sliding it off his shoulders and letting it fall to our feet.

  I pulled away from the kiss to see what he looked like half naked. Damn. He was a fine specimen of a man. I would compare his body to that of a Greek God. His skin was tan. I touched his chest and beneath my fingers his hard skin tightened, he had no chest hair and his arms and shoulders were immense. The suits did a fine job hiding what was underneath. I moved my hand down his stomach tracing over the ridges of his defined six pack. I reached the V leading into his pants and wanted to lick it. I ran my fingernails along the top and his body shivered from my touch. .